We Are Basement Savants

me: oh
well we could at least all hang out tomorrow
or hey we could do red robin
for dinner
david: >_<
yeah we could
me: what?
why is it >_<
?
7:59 PM david: no reason
i just ate there a couple days ago
and when i did, i told my parents "but im going to eat here in another few days..."
me: really?
david: yes
because i knew i probably would
me: lol wow
david: i see the future man
me: I do too
except I'm not actually kidding about it ;P
8:00 PM david: neither was i :}
me: AWESOME
8:01 PM david: [virtual high five!]


david: oh
but yeah we should finish gow
and i should give you new musics
me: yeah
david: well
me: and yes
david: old musics
me: right
but they will be new to me
david: but new to you
liek lulz thith new artitht taylor thwift!!!11
i thall give u her songs bcuz THEY ARE TOALLY MY LIEF
10:24 PM me: YEHA
one of the guys who lives next to me LOVES taylor swift
david: hahaha
me: he is another piano major
it is sad
david: bahaha
the dark side of piano majors
10:25 PM me: well goddamn
it's not all of us
I mean I fucking play Dnd but I don't listen to Taylor Swift
david: haha
10:26 PM you say it like dnd is wrong
me: hahaha
no, it is the most right thing that has ever happened to me!!1!
but in terms of like appearing like a loser to other people
at least I'm doing something that may be weird but can be considered legitimate in it weirdness
david: oh
10:27 PM haha
kind of
me: liking taylor swift is like liking harry potter and thinking you're a hardcore RPGer



david: neighborhood party then family party
then this
me: so raging as in...?
david: going to a lot of parties
8:09 PM me: haha
too bad none of them provide any opportunity for female interaction
roflol
david: psh
what happened to theres not sex in shoreline
therefore why would we bother to hang out with women we know in shoreline
me: it still stand
that's what I'm saying
david: oh
it sounded like you regretted not meeting chixorz
me: oh hell no
8:10 PM david: haha good
me: I already have a girlfriend in the future, remember?
david: THIS IS MAN TIME GAD DAMNIT
oh right
same!

david: omfg!
looking for pictures of steven to use
for a guy that never has an opinion and doesn't like to talk very much
THE KID NEVER SITS STILL
either that or i really suck at taking pictures of him
they're all blurry as hell

I'm Sorry

I owe David, Steve, and Keir and apology.

I shouldn't have left you guys like that tonight—it was real douchebaggery. One of my friends from Eastern called and I was really excited to talk, so I kind of dropped everything else. I ought to have at least said something and signed off BNet so you could know what was going on. I really cocked out this time.

This was a violation of my respect for myself and for you. I gave in to a kakohexis. This won't happen again, unless said person really is in a much more dire circumstance.

That said, let me present you with funny things.

But first, NOTE FOR DAVID regarding Owl City. It is just like The Beatles—the really important things have been shoved under a heap of She Came in THrough the Bathroom Window, Yellow Submarine, and Come Together. The songs which are really meaningful are from the Maybe I'm Dreaming album and are: On the Wing, The Technicolor Phase, Dear Vienna (!!) and I'll Meet You There. Fireflies, off their second album, is also quite good, although it is a hit single.

[breakfast today—Several minutes ago, my mom called the house from work to ask if we have seen her glasses around because she is missing them. She has just called again to say that her glasses were in her backpack all along]

Me: Aha. Hehehehe. That sort of thing is so funny. So, it WAS there all along.
Charlie: What?
Me: When we are looking for something, we look so hard and we cannot find it. When we finally do find it, it's in an easy and obvious place. If we want to find it, what we ought to do is allow ourselves to make it easy, and just relax and think of the object. Then we will be able to find it so easily.
Charlie: Oh no, don't you start this Jedi Master stuff with me again! How about that receipt for mom's picture frame that you lost?!
Me: . . .
[I still haven't found it...]

Taken from a Facebook correspondence with my friend John, who I plan to wed to his girlfriend Jessica in June:


Me: My friend David and I were thikning of themes for the wedding. The best one is definitely the Legend of Zelda wedding, which opens when I start shouting "HEY, LOOK LISTEN, HEY, LISTEN!!!" at all of your friends and family. We'll keep the rings in a chest, but I won't give you the chest until you push my podium to the left. The ceremony concludes when I say IT'S DANGEROUS TO GO ALONE—TAKE THIS and present you and Jessica to each other.

John: While I think that is an excellent wedding plan, Jessica does not seem so enthusatic.

[during Starcraft]
Me: Steven, are you eating something? Your voice sounds funny.
Steven: Yeah, I have a sore.
Me: Ahh. Too much dick lately?
Steven: Too much pussy.
[stunned silence]
David: ...well Davis, now are you glad that you asked?"

Today I had a long conversation with Keir. I have been thinking about reposting parts of it, because it is pretty illustrative of my philosophy, and people have seemed to be more interested in that sort of thing lately.

I look forward to MEGA DND on Wednesday!!!
We ought to get together for New Year's also (or even the whole or a great part of the 31st).

Coming Soon

I will present to you many funny things, and some which are only interesting, and, although I hope not, perhaps some things which are neither funny nor interesting.

About a week ago, my parents bought a flat screen TV. We installed it several days ago. Apparently they bought the special Trailer Trash edition, because the antenna pamphlet sported this important safety warning:
"Do not attempt to install if drunk, pregnant, or both. Do not throw antenna at spouse."


me: did u get a phat drop yesterday?
11:05 PM Steven: I guess
got a lot of new dreads
or...
w/e the slang is for clothes
me: ummmm....
Steven: threads
me: threads?
Steven: maybe that's it
me: dread is hair
lulz
obligatory David paint that shows you in dreads
11:06 PM Steven: haha
11:07 PM me: my mom bought me pants
they are pretty sweet actually
they are like from the 90s
Value Village
Steven: haha
11:08 PM me: damn that village has so many values
maybe it was an infested village
like RE4
and my mom went in a shot up a bunch of crazy Spanish people
and then knifed a box and found some sweet 90s pants
11:09 PM Steven: awesome
I think I'm going to get a 360
11:10 PM me: you get hella moneez for teh buy of 360
??><
Steven: I got a lot of gamestop moneez and I can get a refurbished one for like $100
me: cool
be careful though
11:11 PM those gamestop guys will fuck you up
and take your money
all they wanna do is*bam bam bam bam* and {reload sound} [knife sound] and TAKE UR MONEYYYY!
11:12 PM Steven: haha
I've never had a problem there before
me: yeah but I have read a lot about their dubious business practices
and contempt for employees and customers
but they also have a monopoly
11:13 PM bastards got Boardwalk REAL early on
Steven: lucky dicks
11:14 PM me: lol
licky ducks

david: so
are'st you up for some GoW tomorrow?
me: not sure
I still have to find out what I am doing nowadays
david: like
around the house?
or spending time figuring out ways to fuck with our dnd characters by changing the way we earn exp?
me: hmm
both :)

You MUST see this link. This is a Japanese advertisement for A Link to the Past in '92.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zv5OIvwqkvM&feature=player_embedded


This is also great. The woodland creatures part never made sense to anyone (though I have read a lot of stuff that says that Final Fantasy was originally intended as a biting satire on the genre, so the animals-dropping-money-and-items thing may be one of several huge jokes that have been perpetuated since the first Final Fantasy. I find that extremely interesting).

(psychology shoutout)
*at dinnertime, as I come to the table and am handed a bowl of soup*
Me: Wait, wait everyone. What does this bowl of soup taste like right now?
Mom: What? Do you have a cold? It tastes like vegetable soup!
Charlie: *shit-faced grin*
Me: No, no, I mean what does it taste like RIGHT NOW! See, it's not in my mouth, so it doesn't TASTE like anything. It only has the potential to taste like something.
Mom: What? That's ridiculous. It tastes like vegetable soup!
*conversation continues along this line for a while. Finally I give up*
Charlie: Jesus, glad we're done with that. I thought you were trying out a bunch of philosophy garbage on us, like [mocking tone] "oh no, it doesn't taste like anything right now because you are the one who gives it taste."

This break has been...varied. I spent the first half applying for scholarships and jobs, madly I might add. Christmas and the return of Orion have made me less productive, to an extreme degree. For example, I spent the whole day today building a new experience point system entirely from scratch. It was actually super fun. DnD on Wednesday is going to be awesome.

I don't have the inclination to post anything else, though I would urge you: purge evil from your minds! Listen to Owl City!!! I dont' know if that guy knows what he is saying, but I do, and it is something of grave and amazing importance!!!! (only the first album is really any good for this purpose)

Planeswalker-in-training signing off,

more funny things

I think these are funny, at least:

This was censored at the time because Lucy was there and David did not want to offend her. However, I do not care about offending Lucy.
David: [in response to my statement that I want to know everything] But Davis, what if you found out that God was actually REAL and you were wrong this whole time?!?!!

While driving Meredith and her best friend to the horse barn:
Friend: So our lip sync video has, like, 10,000 views, even though, like, it was up for only like, 2 days.
Me: (driving) WHAT OVER NINE THOUSAND?!
Friend: (condescendingly and politely) No, over ten thousand.
[joke phail]

Rosa: [resolutely] There's never enough meat for me.


There is at least one more good one from Maddy's party last night...but I can't remember it.

On Counterstrike

me:
well I just saw Davi'd status
and I was like OMG
Steven: but not zomg?
haha
me: yeah
that's reserved for more groundbreaking things


me: I played a game yesterday
Steven: wow awesome
me: and now I want to play so much
Steven: real map?
me: yeah
12:59 PM it was offline
Steven: oic
me: TvZ
and I suck so much cock
Steven: haha that's ok
we will probably have to play BGH
me: it was terrible
Steven: but it's a good map
me: thank God I don't have an apm counter


Steven: so what's the problem?
me: but remember I can't use launchers
since I'm running on OSX
problem with windows
is that I don't have the original SC cd to do an install
Steven: oh ok
so you want to be able to use a launcher
me: that is realy the only problem
Steven: but you don't have it on windows
1:06 PM me: the rest was just bitching
Steven: o ic

1:08 PM also I will install cs today
so we can play later
in the week or whatevs
Steven: sweet
hopefully you can get Orion to play
I have had no luck
1:09 PM me: hmmm
yeah we have to change our tactics
he used to like science
now he mainly likes pornography and creepily talking about girls that he meets
and other penis-related activities
SO
damn I was thinking we could tell him that Ashley plays but she is your gf
we need another girl
Steven: damnit davis
me: someone who he can't resist
Steven: haha
me: okay wait wait
he always talked really creepily about those exchange studetns Linnea had
Kari, that was her name
okay
we need to facebook Kari
and convince her either to play CS
or to say that she is playing CS
Steven: haha
it's perfect
me: like a status update: "playing cs with davis, david, and steven right now lol"
then Orion will have nowhere to run
Steven: haha
me: the bigger of his two heads
--and this is really a fine distinction because his regular head is quite big most of the time--
will lead him to Counterstrike
Steven: or we could try to hack Orion's steam account and delete kotor and then he will have nothing to play but css
Me: yes
but that strategy doesn't involve as much insulting conversation that I can post on my blog later
Steven: haha true
okay the hacking
that's plan B
he's conservative so he doesn't like Plan B
so he will HAVE to fall for Plan A
Steven: your logic is indisputable
1:16 PM me: and so is the fact that he will soon be playing CS within our icy grasp
ttyl, maybe like 3 ish
Steven: alright

Lucy 2.0

This conversation shall be separated into many small parts. Its humor value is thus enhanced.


me: PM so, so, so, I might actually be bored enough to visit you this week
I didn't phrase that very well
Lucy: wow
what a great friend


me: it's not you
it's the driving
suffice to say that I hate driving in Seattle
11:35 PM Lucy: you could bus it
me: ooh damn but that involves waiting, a thing that I hate even MORE than driving
God this is hard
I hate so many things


is there a place where I may park?
a lot, perhaps/
11:38 PM Lucy: yeah but not for free :(
me: oh God
forget that!!!!


Lucy: you really should facebook stalk me before you ask questions like that



Lucy:
it still won't be free until after 6
and i probably won't be there by then
me: RRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Meteros, God of Parking, why do you vex me so?!
Have I not poured out many libations to your meters?
11:42 PM Have I not sacrificed many carbeurators in your honor?
(or at the least, fuel-injection systems?)

More things to say

Perhaps I actually don't have them [more things to say]. But, damned if I don't need a title.

First, funny quotes.

Mom: So Davis, when are you going to shave your sideburns?
Me (sarcastically): Well, I was thinking next week.
Mom (surprised): Really?
Me: No.
Mom: Hmmph. Well, I like you a lot better without them.
Me: Well, I like you a lot better when you're 300 miles away, but here we are.
Mom: [disgruntled but slightly amused look]
Charlie: [takes 10 on Bluff to conceal his silent laughter]

Meredith: (no, actually, I won't do this one. It's too had-to-be-there)


me: so from now on we can play some CS maybe
not tonite though prob
Steven: k
did you tell Orion?
because now all 4 of us have it
so that will be cool
me: yeah
he knows
Steven: albert and ben play sometimes too...
so we could do 3v3 wow
or just join some random server
me: yeah
ti will be just like GW!
except hopefully more lastingly fun
Steven: haha yeah
me: I actually really liked vanqing
mostly
Steven: css can be really frustrating too
but luckily I can mostly only get pissed at myself
so it's different when I get pissed in GW
me: yeah
Steven: then when*
me: since CS requires mainly skill
GW requires mainly David not cockblocking you
Steven: haha so true


Read right to left. The important thing here is that the whole David conversation occurred BEFORE the whole Steven conversation.


Also, today I made the most uber Dr. Kevorkian joke ever. I don't necessarily want to tell you guys...I just want to remember.

There are more of these, but I have mislaid some of them.

One more thing:


Unfortunately, this actually happened. I believe it was not much earlier than the Firebats-in-the-toilet episode.

Things!
I worked very hard and very long on my huge mega paper which discusses ancient Greek music theory. It is awesome. I also had some other finals which were mainly boring and/or easy.
Next quarter will be my first time NOT studying the Greeks in college...I have traded it for a class that is much more socially valuable. Perhaps more on that later.

I tried out to be in the Symphonic choir (there are 3; it is the middle one) next quarter. I got in and one of the voice Masters students told me that my audition was the best one (which frankly doesn't bode well for the voice department). In any case, I got in to the uber-highest choir, Chamber, but it conflicts with a stupid Communications 200 class that I must take for Education requirements. Thus, no dice.

The quarter went by very quickly, and I got so much out of it. More than anyone will EVAR KNOW!! That is, if I told you my ideas, you would think that I am [even more] crazy. LULZ@

I am home now, OBVVVVVVVVVVVVVV!!! So, much gaming must happen. I will probably alternate between applying for jobs and scholarships and having marathon gaming days with y'all guys. We ought to try for 2 sessions of DND, because that would be teh roxx0rz.
Also this break I must finish The Romantic Manifesto (Ayn Rand) so that Ayn Rand girl will give me The Fountainhead. She is to finish Aristotle so that I will give her 1984. It's like the book swap in elementary school all over again, but this time with more introspective dialogue and knavish jokes (those would be coming from my side of the table).
Also I want to review my French notes and solidify my French speaking so that I can begin Latin without feeling linguistically incompetent.
Also I have lots of listening, mainly Beethoven and some jazz guys, to get through, and I have at least 3 movies to watch--movies which deal with the nature of reality and human efficacy.

This brings me to my next point: Said amorous affairs. Since I know that Lucy LOVES hearing about them, I shall mention them briefly, and paraphrase Rosa a bit.
All three of them have been resolved favorably--I daresay in the most favorable way possible. If you want to know more, you must ask.

I think that that is all for now. Someday soon I have several fugues to write, because I can't get these themes out of my head.

ALSO:
Here is a picture of my child: